This past week has brought with it many challenges. They were all fairly minor issues/challenges in the whole scheme of things, but as one piled on top of another and another and another my eyes were pulled away from the One who is really in control and I fell apart. The final straw was yesterday when I finally made it to the Department of Motor Vehicle after dealing with inspection issues and repairs the prior few days. I had done my research well ahead of time, and found that Virginia had an unreal list of requirements to obtain tags. I carefully collected each item they said I needed. I had my stack of paperwork. I was prepared and looking forward to putting this behind me! I waited my turn in line, and happily gave my stack of papers to the clerk when it was my turn. Within seconds she very matter a factly told me that they would not procede without my husband's ID. WHAT?? I had studied up for this, I knew what I was doing, I had my Power of Attorney, I had everthing they said I would need, I was prepared!! I spent the next 20 minutes or so trying to convince the clerk, the supervisor, and the next supervisor that they were all very sadly mistaken.....surely if they understood my circumstances, if they reread their own rules.....they could not do this to me!! They were very lacking in their empathy skills, and I ended back up in my van, still with Oklahoma tags that would expire in just 1 short week.....just a few days before R&R. I sat in my van sobbing in despair.
Now almost 24 hours later I'm still not sure how this will all turn out. I still have tags that are about to expire which will keep me from being able to enter the military installation where my home is, but in the stillness and quietness of this Saturday I can hear God speaking to me in that still small voice reminding me that I often repsond to Him in the same way I repsonded to the employees at the DMV. I research, I plan, and prepare for the life that I have planned and fall apart when life isn't quite what I expected. God's reponse to me is found in Isaiah 55:8-13.
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith Jehovah. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. For as the rain cometh down and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, and giveth seed to the sower and bread to the eater; so shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing; and all the trees of the fields shall clap their hands. Instead of the thorn shall come up the fir-tree; and instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle-tree: and it shall be to Jehovah for a name, for an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off."
I am SO thankful for the reminder that I am not in charge. What a mess I would make! I serve a God who sees the beginning and the end and orchestrates my life in a way that "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him. {1 Corinthians 2:9}
For my friends who are hurting so deeply right now I pray you are able to find hope in these verses. My heart aches for you. The following link is to a beautiful poem. The Life I Planned by Beth Moore
